Movies I can’t believe don’t have commentaries

MicrophoneThis is just a list of movies that I, Zarban, can’t believe have not been the subject of a fan commentary and/or vicious mocking.

In no particular order of disbelief:

Most recently off the list

Here are movies that used to be on my list but have recently been given commentaries. Thanks everyone!

  1. Wavatar
    2011.May.14 3am

    Here is one movie I wish somebody would do commentary for “THE RING.”

  2. Wavatar
    2011.Oct.27 7pm

    ■ Casino Royale (1966 Niven)
    Never Say Never Again (1983 Connery)
    ■ GoldenEye
    ■ The World is Not Enough
    ■ Nightmare on Elm Street 4 (a free one)
    ■ Nightmare on Elm Street 5 (ditto)
    ■ Freddy’s Dead
    ■ New Nightmare
    ■ Halloween 4
    ■ Halloween 5
    ■ Halloween 6 (a free one)
    ■ Halloween: Resurrection

    ■ Frankenstein Meets the Wolf Man
    ■ House of Frankenstein
    ■ House of Dracula
    ■ House of the Wolf Man
    Friday the 13th: A New Beginning (a free one)
    ■ Friday the 13th: The Final Chapter (a free one)

    ■ Texas Chainsaw Massacre (sequals, remake and its prequal)
    Family Guy: Stewie Griffin the Untold Story (or any episodes)
    ■ any Dirty Harry movie
    ■ Stephen King’s It (a free one)

    ■ Paul (Pegg, Frost and Rogen)
    Aliens VS Predator 2
    ■ Hellraiser (the whole francise, exept 2)

  3. Wavatar
    David L.
    2012.Apr.17 2am

    In my mind, the big “offenders” are classic films from the 1930s-1950s. The real reason is that so many of the participants have passed away, so even recent DVD releases have either: a) no commentary at all; or b) “film historian” commentaries that vary greatly in quality. Most of the Criterion Collection releases have excellent “historian” commentaries (notably the Kurosawa films), however.

    I suppose that this evades the question of “fan commentaries.” On the one hand, there may not be too many real “fans” today of series films like the Thin Man, Charlie Chan, and the Falcon. On the other hand, many true classics with real fans are fairly well-represented by the experts, and it is very difficult to produce a fan commentary that isn’t just a form of cribbing. In other words, good info isn’t easy to find.

    Here, in no particular order, are some films that I would like to do that either have no commentaries at all to my knowledge (my knowledge may not be perfect), or the “historian” commentaries are inadequate (noted when applicable):

    1) The Thin Man (and its 5 sequels);
    2) The Glass Key;
    3) Nightmare Alley (great historical commentary, but very dry);
    4) The Longest Day (see above);
    5) Midway;
    6) Some Like it Hot;
    7) The Best Years of Our Lives (perhaps the best B&W film ever made);
    8) The Petrified Forest;
    9) Fort Apache;
    10) She Wore a Yellow Ribbon;
    11) Rio Grande;
    12) The Good Earth;
    13) Manhattan Melodrama;
    14) His Girl Friday;
    15) To Hell and Back;
    16) 3 Godfathers;
    17) The Magnificent 7;
    18) The Great Escape;
    19) My Man Godfrey;
    20) Life with Father;
    21) Gung-ho! (1943) (getting hard to find in any format);
    22) Bringing up Baby;
    23) Cold Comfort Farm (newer movie, but no commentary!).

    Looking at these, it dawns on me that most internet-savvy folks have never even seen these movies, much less have ready access to them. The comedies (and I tried to avoid them) are problematic. The only worse thing than a commentary like, “that was funny,” is having to explain a dated joke!

    At any rate, the main thing holding me back is that I am not very technically proficient. As you may guess, I am an older gent, and I would appreciate any detailed tips on how to set up some minimal equipment and software. (I don’t even own a microphone.)

    Since this post has gone on so long, I might as well list a few movies that I would LOVE to comment upon, even though they have excellent “official” commentaries of various types:

    1) The Searchers;
    2) Will Success Spoil Rock Hunter? (funniest movie ever?);
    3) The Girl Can’t Help It (Paul McCartney’s fave film);
    4) Stagecoach;
    5) Days of Wine and Roses (Jack Lemmon version, natch);
    6) Ladies and Gentlemen: The Fabulous Stains (best official “fan” commentary to date);
    7) Dirty Harry.

  4. Wavatar
    2012.Apr.17 2am

    I’d love to hear fan commentaries for those classic films. Here is some advice on how to record a commentary.

  5. Wavatar
    2012.Jun.17 1am

    Ed and His Dead Mother

  6. Wavatar
    Jason "Jimbo" Ritter
    2013.Feb.14 12am

    You need to History of the world Part 1 to your list

  7. Wavatar
    Oliver Bain
    2013.Jun.01 4pm

    Very few Billy Wilder movies with commentaries, which is strange…

  8. Wavatar
    2013.Jun.01 4pm

    Someone needs to do One Two Three.

  9. Wavatar
    Oliver Bain
    2013.Jul.18 4pm

    Or ‘Some Like It Hot’, or ‘The Apartmen’, or ‘The Fortune Cookie’, or ‘Double Indemnity’ or any of three or four others. Sadly my mob aren’t into it.

  10. Wavatar
    Jason "Jimbo" Ritter
    2013.Jul.18 11pm

    How about a forrest gump commentary?

  11. Wavatar
    Rob Smith
    2013.Dec.28 3pm

    How about the series “Lone Gunmen” … X Files spinoff

  12. Wavatar
    Jason "Jimbo" Ritter
    2014.Feb.28 11pm

    How about The Departed or Django Unchained

  13. Wavatar
    rob smith
    2014.Mar.08 12pm

    I’d like to hear an alternative commentary for Stephen Kings Christine

  14. Wavatar
    2014.Mar.10 12pm

    You need to cross off Pee-Wee’s Big Adventure, Waterworld and Above the Law.

  15. Wavatar
    2014.Mar.10 12pm

    I can’t believe there isn’t any Kurosawa other than Hidden Fortress [and Yojimbo if you count Tysto’s A Fistful of Dollars simulcomm]. Come on people. Get a little culture here. I think someone like Rob Caravaggio [or more from Tysto, wink wink] would do Kurosawa justice. And no frat comms, please.

  16. Wavatar
    2014.Apr.29 4am

    I would love if somebody did one for firestarter.

  17. Wavatar
    Jacob Juenger
    2014.Aug.10 10pm

    How about All Quiet on the Western Front from 1930 or any version of Mutiny on the Bounty?

  18. Wavatar
    2014.Aug.16 7pm

    Bonnie and Clyde needs a commentary.

  19. Wavatar
    rob smith
    2014.Sep.14 4pm

    cannot find a commentary for Weird Science..would be a good choice i think

  20. Wavatar
    2015.Feb.24 2pm

    I would love to do ‘Bringing up Baby’, ‘Ball of Fire’ or ‘His Girl Friday’ but feel historically unequipped. They are awesome, though.

Comment on this commentary

Get a Gravatar — Allowed code: <a href="xxx"> <b> <i> <strike> <img src="xxx">

Safari hates me