Quotes from Pulsing Cinema

Doctor Manhattan in the book— God, I can’t believe we’re talkin’ about this…. We’re gonna talk about d*cks. All right. … It’s the elephant in the room, sirs. — Down in Front,
Watchmen @1:19:25

Here are the peasants. They’re finally making their way to the outside of the castle. With their infectious dead in a cart! ‘Please let us in!’ — Terror Transmission,
Masque of the Red Death @1:09:45

Even a guy who’s crazy weird lookin’ like this guy? Yeah? Enough booze, enough misfortune, enough manipulation, I think he could get one night of grief sex. … Don’t work hard. Work smart. — Terror Transmission,
Mad Love @0:59:37

James Potter has one line. … And I just always envision Dan looking back like, ‘I’m sorry, who are you?’ … What is James Potter to the Harry Potter films, really? — MuggleCast,
Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows 2 @1:31:08

Here’s why this movie sucks already. Bruce Campbell’s dead. The best thing in this movie, and he’s dead within the first 7 minutes. — DVD PodBlast,
Congo @0:10:06

A sixth floor walk-up, mind you. There’s no elevator here. If I were the assassin, that would foil the attack right then. [laughs] By the time I got to the sixth floor, the president would’ve appeared in the square and then left. — Tysto Commentaries,
Day of the Jackal @2:18:49

[as Molly Weasley to Harry] In a hilarious turn of events, you’re rooming with Professor Snape. He’s tidy, goes to bed early, and hates rap music. — Rifftrax,
Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix @0:13:40

Why do I feel like I’ve seen this? Because it’s like every other Final Destination movie. … I do love the first one and the third one, but they are all essentially the same movie. — Death’s Door Prods,
Final Destination 5 @0:09:33

If you had a protocol droid … that was so heavily involved in diplomacy, why would make him so irritating? … You wouldn’t make, for example, Jimmy Carr ambassador to Iraq. … Yeah, you would. — Speakeasy,
Star Wars 5: The Empire Strikes Back @0:12:32

Should have got Dick Van Dyke to [play Charlie Croker]. His cockney accent is legendary. — Renegade Commentaries,
The Italian Job

[as Kirk] Scottie, that just isn’t gonna work. You gotta do better. [laughter] … [as Scottie] But sir, you gave me two sticks to rub together. F*** you. You’ve been ruinin’ my self-esteem for thirty years! — TWIG Commentaries,
Star Trek 4 @1:25:02

Oh, she’s missin’ a tooth. [pause] That ain’t a deal-breaker, tho, when you’re five. — Sick Feats,
Up @0:06:19

[as George Kirk] Gonna hang up now. A bit busy at the moment, darling. I’m being splattered all over the front of the ship. I asked you not to call me at work. — MMM Commentaries,
Star Trek @0:11:23

[closing moments, to 'La Marseillaise'] ♪♫ How taaall was Charles DeGaulle? I’ll look it uuup; I can’t recall. When heee was still ali-ive, it looks like heeee was six-foot-five!’ ♪♫ — Tysto Commentaries,
Day of the Jackal @2:27:41

If this were made today, … a really good Beetlejuice … would have been Sam Rockwell. Oh my god, yes! — Sofa Dogs,
Beetlejuice @0:50:05

Galaxy Quest, Shaun of the Dead, Ghostbusters are pretty much the holy trinity. [murmurs of agreement] I don’t think there’s any better genre parodies that are also great examples of the genre. — Down in Front,
Shaun of the Dead @0:05:24

This is a life-long commitment that this bird creature makes to Jake Sully. And then he literally just uses it to get to another, bigger one. — Speakeasy,
Avatar @1:05:00

The dog tasted the blood of the werewolf, now. Does he turn into a weredog? … A werewoof? — DVD PodBlast,
Cursed @0:19:26

Rygel is an old, fat politician who got defeated. … All he wants to do is sleep, eat, and get revenge. …. He’s kind of like Ted Kennedy. — Poufwa Exchange,
Farscape 1×01 @0:33:41

That’s Mitchell and Webb doing the voices of these robots. I quite enjoyed these. — Impossible Podcasts,
Doctor Who ‘Dinosaurs on a Spaceship’ @0:19:05

[re: going to the cinema] Wait, wait, wait. You don’t get out of it that easily. You two bozos, right? [laughter] You had a choice between this or Stop or My Mom Will Shoot? You went for Stop or My Mom Will Shoot?! — DVDCommentaries.co.UK,
Memoirs of an Invisible Man @0:29:57

Gee, isn’t it interesting that the president’s wife and Will Smith’s girlfriend have met in this disaster while the president and Will Smith have just met down in Area 51? — Down in Front,
Independence Day @1:25:24

I can’t wait for the episode where we find out the gap between her teeth is actually a portal to another dimension. I think the cliffhanger … will be having to seal the gap in her teeth to stop the Cybermen from coming thru. — Tachyon TV,
Torchwood ‘Cyberwoman’

I thought he was a bad guy, which is a little bit sad. I think it shows the stereotyping of men with beards. … Mickey a terrorist?! … He’s got an AK-47-style gun; he’s got a beard; and he’s not white. He’s definitely a terrorist. — Podcast of Impossible Things,
Doctor Who ‘End of Time 2’ @1:05:20

[Nielsen is] actually quite cute in this— No, she’s not. … She was never cute. She always looked liked Dolph Lundgren in a dress. — Chin Stroker vs Punter,
Cobra @0:06:40

You know what I love about the future in these movies? What’s that? There’s always something on fire. [laughter] If you’re cold in the future, in a Terminator movie, you’re all right. ‘Cause there’s a fire … everywhere. — Bronson Five,
Terminator 3 @0:04:19

This is the brightest-lit strip club I’ve ever seen. Yeah. Or read once in a book. — DVD PodBlast,
Blues Brothers 2000 @0:37:48

The thing that annoys me about this scene is Alec Guinness? He just does such a terrible Ewan McGregor impression. [laughter] He sounds just not a thing like him. — Speakeasy,
Star Wars 6: Return of the Jedi @0:47:27

If all these guys that are friends are a little bit psychic, why don’t they just start up a detective agency or something that would make money? The stock market! Horse-racing! — DVD PodBlast,
Dreamcatcher @0:12:32

Is it just me, or does that paste look quite nice? … Well, Johnson likes it. … [laughter] I love Johnson. … He’s such an arse-kisser, a sniveling little sh**, isn’t he? — DVDCommentaries.co.uk,
RoboCop @0:29:44

How would this compare with other shows that have Christmas specials? … Would there be anything that would come close to what they do in this? Your father’s home movies when he’s really, really drunk. — MMM Commentaries,
Star Wars Holiday Special @0:10:23

[as Havok, re: success] Oh! All I have to do is not move my torso around, and it goes straight? Are you f***ing kidding me? … I was under the impression that I had to get all jiggy with it whenever I used my power. — Ultimate Movie Commentary,
X-Men: First Class @1:22:11

Hey, look! There’s plot in the background! .. Yes, Harry, look over there! … [as Hermione] I think there’s some plot watching us by the church. — Tysto Commentaries,
Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows 1 @1:28:15

[re: the book] Norman is older, overweight, balding—a much more pitiful character. More like Hitchcock himself. Yeah, more like Hitchcock himself. [laughter] So they changed that. — Commentary Track Stars,
Psycho (1960) @0:06:15

[counting his scars] [as Hex] I need to take a number 2. — Film Dogs,
Jonah Hex @0:18:57

When there’s explosions in space ships and stuff, always, as soon as a ceiling panel explodes, a bunch of tubes fall out. Oh, I know. It’s like the ceiling is packed with loose tubes. — Jon Madsen and friends,
Star Trek @0:08:50

Does that mean Gizmo’s a girl? Or are they like seahorses, where the men give birth? They’re nothing. They’re like seahorses. — Technicolor Commentary,
Gremlins @0:37:38

[re: broom-riding] If only there was some kind of sport-like activity that our protagonist could take part in later in the film that could offer me, the viewer, more of this pulse-pounding pure entertainment. — Rifftrax,
Harry Potter and the Sorcerer’s Stone @1:00:38

[trash compactor scene] Now is the, um… is the garbage there… to your liking? — MMM Commentaries,
Star Wars 4: A New Hope

[alien ship vibrates moon surface without contact] It’s dumb thing number one. This is gonna be a long list. Get your notepads. — Commentary Track Stars,
Independence Day @0:05:23

Get 40 more…