You got about 70% seriousness and about 30% comedy. … Don’t you mean the other way around?… You said 70% serious. … That’s what I mean, yeah. … This is a comedy. …I’d say it’s 70 comedy, 30 drama. Really?
— Soulless Minions of Orthodoxy,
Ishtar @0:54:28
That Sharktopus is really angry! Why is it so angry? And why is it so powerful? If it’s that angry, it should run for public office. That is the way we do things in America.
— Tysto Commentaries,
Sharktopus @1:03:08
You would think, with a title like The Hidden Fortress, that the story is going to be all about the hidden fortress, right? … But in fact, … we leave almost as soon as we can.
— Tysto Commentaries,
The Hidden Fortress @0:33:42
[dancing scene] I don’t feel so good, Eric. Yeah, I know, with the f***in’ spinning? God, they can stop that now. Aaaand now. Aaaand stop. You just close your eyes. I’ll tell you when it’s over.
— Sofa Dogs,
Carrie @1:05:53
['Frick' and 'Frack' are] supposed to be protecting the princess. … They’re Hayakawa, … so they don’t have any inborn loyalty, but they also don’t have any inborn decency, for godssake. They draw straws to see who will rape her first.
— Tysto commentaries,
The Hidden Fortress @1:39:44
[re: John Scott being transparent] This dude still looks better than me without a shirt on.
— Sofa Dogs,
Fringe ‘Pilot’ @0:36:19
[re: goal save, as player] That doesn’t look like Tolliver. [as other player] Doesn’t matter. We’re winning. [as spectator] Hey! That’s Enrico Palazzo!
— Film Sack,
Sudden Death @1:23:05
[re: cat Hermione] Yikes! She’s a furry! And a hybrid subgenre of Potter slash fic is born.
— Rifftrax,
Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets @1:27:42
[re: Ramius] John McTiernan brought [Klaus Maria Brandauer] in, but he just didn’t feel like he was the right fit for the role. Not Scottish enough.
— MMM Commentaries,
The Hunt for Red October @0:02:44
[as horror film makers] We know these movies suck. … But we do it to save the universe. So that’s okay, right?
— Down in Front,
Cabin in the Woods @1:30:52
It could have been interesting if Kate Beckinsale was the one that ended up as the werewolf. Oh! … She would be tweaked by that! … Ahh, that would have been so much better. And then Van Helsing has to fight her. He has to kill her.
— What Are You Doing, Movie?,
Van Helsing @1:55:13
This is an odd moment where we get Voldemort in a very nice suit. One wonders if Ralph Fiennes didn’t say, ‘Hey, how about if Voldemort appears in a really nice, expensive suit that I can wear to the Oscars later?’
— Tysto Commentaries,
Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix @0:32:42
Say what you will about George Lucas—and you have— [laughter] —but at least it took him 20 years to ruin Star Wars. [laughter] And the Wachowski Brothers managed to do it in about 3.
— Speakeasy,
The Matrix @0:04:32
I like that Michael Clarke Duncan didn’t just dress up as a woman. He went so far as to put on eye shadow. Sure, man. Michael Clarke Duncan does not do anything half-assed. … He puts his whole ass into it.
— Gymkommentary,
The Scorpion King @1:10:29
[Gemma Chan] graduated from the Drama Centre at London in 2008…. [43 minutes later] Listen to this: she went to Drama Centre at London…. Were you listening at the beginning of the show at all?
— Cultdom Collective,
Sherlock ‘The Blind Banker’ @0:04:04
[Amy is] a lot taller than Billie Piper, because it has to look up at her. … These Daleks were built so they could look Billie Piper in the eye.
— Staggering Stories,
Doctor Who ‘Victory of the Daleks’ 0:08:54
In the next 7 years, humanity undergoes a complete technological collapse, and they have to reinvent all electronics from scratch. And in 2017, … they’ve got to … the same level [as] the mid- to late-1980s.
— Speakeasy,
The Running Man @0:06:26
[female voice] I love everything about this Doc Oc. … Even the man-boobs? Especially the man-boobs. I love me some double-D guy-boobs.
— Amazing Spider-Cast,
Spider-Man 2 @0:13:52
Wouldn’t it be great if, literally, ‘full of stars’ was just all dead stars go there, like Don Knotts and Bob Hope? So it’s like the elephant’s graveyard except for celebrities…? It’s like Night of A Thousand Stars in a monolith on Europa.
— Fred Entertainment,
2010 @0:03:52
What’s also missing from this one is a bit of the black comedy that the original had. … Some people look at it as a response to the Reagan idea of the perfect family and all that sh*t.
— Horror Movie a Day,
The Stepfather @0:47:41
[Tim and Lex greet Ian] They didn’t have a relationship with him on the island. They were with Dr. Graham. ‘There’s that guy we kind of know!’ … ‘Who also ran in the same general direction as us!’
— Down in Front,
The Lost World: Jurassic Park @0:15:40
[re: You Again] The fact that you’ve got Ripley and Laurie Strode in a film together, chick flick or not, I want to see that film.
— DVDCommentaries.co.uk,
Halloween H20: 20 Years Later @0:10:09
In this decade, for Karloff, he had a TV show. … He was all over the cover of magazines. … And of course he was still doing a lot of film work, as well. Did he do Playgirl?
— Terror Transmission,
Mad Monster Party @0:07:57
This old lady fight is kind of weirding me out. … It’s hot!
— Hey, Want to Watch a Movie?,
Willow @2:06:19
It seems that even Bond cars are made and not born, because they seem to have dubbed the car with a nice V8 rumble instead of the high-pitched V4 whine that a Lotus Esprit really would have had.
— Tysto Commentaries,
For Your Eyes Only @0:57:30
[re: Snape's difficult questions] Harry should be answering ‘Your mom’ to all these questions.
— Hogwarts Radio,
Harry Potter and the Sorcerer’s Stone @0:53:45
Oh my god, the chopper’s sitting on the other side of this tunnel he’s driving thru. Just drive thru it, man! You’re in an ambulance! You can do it! I don’t know about that. I’ve done it. Look: I have a huge scar now.
— Technicolor Commentary,
The Fugitive @0:36:44
[re: lambs conversation] For this movie, this is the equivalent of a car chase.
— Down in Front,
Silence of the Lambs @1:17:15
What’s he like in a normal pub fight? Does he just break people’s necks constantly? Hold on. Can I just say? Sandy says ‘normal pub fight’ as if it’s something normal. … I’ve never been in a pub fight.
— Blogtor Who,
Torchwood ‘Miracle Day: Rendition’ @0:50:57
[David Tennant's hair] became the back-combed bouffant, … I think, in ‘Fear Her.’ … Well, ‘Fear Her’ is a seminal episode. Yes, seminal in that it made me go, ‘Not every Doctor Who is good.’
— Radio Free Skaro,
Doctor Who ‘The Next Doctor’
Just how I like my movies to end: on notes of confusion, panic, frustration, fear, and emptiness. That’s right. Kickin’ Joseph Campbell right in the nuts.
— Gymkommentary,
Wolverine @1:44:15
How often do you end up with a problem where the puppeteer can’t see the actor and you pop him in the face? … I punched Anthony Edwards in the head once with a dog. [laughter] That’s my new favorite sentence.
— Down in Front,
Little Shop of Horrors (1986) @0:36:48
That was a beautiful scene. And—chicken notwithstanding—it is a beautiful episode because of that scene.
— Staggering Stories,
Doctor Who ‘Vincent and the Doctor’ @0:42:32
Oh my god. They’re f***ing Batman-voicing at each other as hard as they can right now.
— Down in Front,
Terminator Salvation @1:10:14
Why was there a baby crying [in the mugger's vision]? Did you hear that? He mugged a baby. … I think this was for a different movie called Things We Lost in the Fire
— Slam/Smash Co.,
Ghost Rider @0:56:48
They’re not imprinting! … It’s a Gallagher show! First three rows ♪♫ may get bloody! ♪♫ … [wild laughter] Now: we really want you to invest. Open your hearts and your wallets.
— DVD PodBlast,
Splice @1:01:41
Anakin and Luke are both filled with anger and … they’re the greatest jedis ever! [Yoda] should look for angry kids! … Of course, one of them did turn to the dark side, so you’re really battin’ 50/50 with the angry kids.
— Tysto Commentaries,
Star Wars 5: The Empire Strikes Back @1:05:41
We’ve just seen this huge list of dancers. It’s actually longer than the list of stunt men in this movie, which for an action movie is probably quite shameful.
— Speakeasy,
The Running Man @1:40:14
James Woods is the closest thing we have to a villain. Not only do I hate him, I agree with him. He’s right, darn it.
— Down in Front,
Contact @2:24:57
Hermione keeps taking us to places that … were important to her at some point. I’m afraid … we’re going to end up apparating into the bedroom that Viktor Krum used when he came to Hogwarts.
— Tysto Commentaries,
Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows 1 @1:34:06
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