About this commentary
- Listed under:
- Star Trek (2009) (15)
- 2009.Nov.16 / 10pm
Star Trek (2009)by: Rifftrax • tags: 2000s • feature • Kurtzman.&.Orci.story • pay • Star.Trek • directed by: J.J.Abrams • stars: Eric.Bana • Karl.Urban • Simon.Pegg • Zoe.Saldana
with: Bill.Corbett • Kevin.Murphy • Michael.J.Nelson
Like the odometer on your 1984 Plymouth Reliant rolling back over to zero, the Star Trek series gets a reset! The previous thirty-eight films had barely begun to scratch the surface of these fascinating characters, and so Star Trek is back to answer all your burning questions: What’s Scotty’s favorite brand of bacon? Why does no one seize the moment and slap the hell out of Chekov? Why does Uhura jam that huge piece of machined steel into her ear? Was Spock’s mom younger than him, and which uncle taught him that nerve pinchy thing?
A tour de force of shameless retconning, Star Trek nevertheless introduces a bold new sci-fi innovation: time travel! And black holes! And characters meeting themselves! And ice planets! And evil nemeses who vow revenge! And ship flybys! These are by themselves very compelling reasons to watch, but Star Trek gives you an even more compelling one—to learn Uhura’s first name. Sure, you never knew she didn’t have a first name, it was never an issue for you, and you haven’t even given it one millisecond’s thought, but at last you get to find out! (It’s Nyota, by the way.)
Mike, Kevin and Bill self-consciously tug down their red Federation uniform tops and go boldly into Star Trek!
[infant Kirk cries] [as George Kirk] Lieutenant Baby? Is that you? Leonardo DiCaprio, in a very special cameo role.— Rifftrax,
Star Trek (2009) @0:11:57
Kirk is ejected, along with a dog-eared copy of Twilight. Ah, they packed him toilet paper. That was thoughtful.— ,
Star Trek (2009) @1:13:45