Almighty Thor

From Tysto commentaries:

It’s a genuine mockbuster from The Asylum, so join me and my special guest Wegel Pinsky—if you dare—as we slog thru the adventures of a totally-not-mighty Thor being schooled by a Mexican chick to fight a superpowerful Darth Loki in the forests of Scandinavia and, for some reason, alleys of Los Angeles and repeatedly losing his weapons. It probably doesn’t help that we’ve just come from seeing the Marvel Thor movie in the theater and more-or-less enjoyed it.

We try to figure out just what the characters are trying to do and why the chick with the weird name and weirder accent knows everything and Thor knows nothing. We try to figure out why Richard Grieco is just wandering around. And we try to figure out if this is the worst movie we’ve ever seen or just one of the worst movies we’ve ever seen. We enjoy the terror dogs from Ghostbusters and the lindworms from—I don’t know—Lind? Do not operate heavy machinery after watching this film.

Let’s look up Cody Deal as Thor. … He was the Roman soldier at Caesar’s Palace in the movie The Hangover. [laughter] That’s why I recognize him! … He gets around. — Tysto Commentaries,
Almighty Thor @0:02:52

I like the terror dogs there from Ghostbusters there. They’re welcome. It’s nice to see them working again. Them and Richard Grieco! — Tysto Commentaries,
Almighty Thor @0:10:48

This is ‘Jarnsaxa.’ Nuh-uh! That’s her name in the film! … Played, appropriately enough, by Patricia Velasquez. She is apparently from Spanish mythology. [laughter] Surely the Spanish had their own set of gods, right? — Tysto Commentaries,
Almighty Thor @0:25:29

It’s a good thing he got this training… from—? That eleven seconds of training that he got from being beaten up by a girl? Yeah. — Tysto Commentaries,
Almighty Thor @0:48:23

This might be the worst movie I’ve ever seen. Yeah. It is a pretty bad film. I can’t deny that. It does not have the charm—particularly—of the giant sea monster movies. — Tysto Commentaries,
Almighty Thor @1:08:13

Alright, fire of Muspelheim! Gesundheit. — Tysto Commentaries,
Almighty Thor @1:19:34

He’s forging a hammer in his hands out of lava. He seems to be a lot tougher there in that moment than he ever was any other moment of the film. Like when he got beat up by that girl three times? Yes. — Tysto Commentaries,
Almighty Thor @1:22:51